Sunday, April 18, 2010

When is Keeping a Secret Better Than Telling a Lie?

If you brought an $800 handbag, but told your mate that it was on sale for $99, is that something worth lying about? If you told your mate that you only had three sexual partners before him, but in reality you had ten, is this something worth lying about? If you tell your mate that you graduated from college, but in reality you barely finished high school, is this something worth lying about? What is the difference between lying and keeping a secret?


A secret is when you keep an event or fact completely to yourself. Therefore, you never have to embellish the truth because the fact is never revealed. So is keeping a secret better than telling a lie? Some may think by simply omitting the fact makes it better than telling a lie. Some may argue when you embellish the truth and your mate finds out about it then you subject yourself to being labeled a” liar”. However, if you completely omit to reveal the truth then you have more options to explain why.

Should you tell your mate everything about you, no matter how big or how small? This is a personal judgment call. Most men like to look at their significant other as being “pure” and “angelic”. She could have kids from a previous marriage/relationship, divorced, or he could have taken her from her former boyfriend. Most men like to believe that their woman was put on this earth only for them and that’s the image they would like to keep in their minds when it comes to the woman that they love, as a delicate flower. In most cases once this image is tainted it is very hard for a man to see his woman in the same light as he did before. It could be a sexual experience she had years before even knowing him, but the minute he finds out about that man from the past that man is now present in your current relationship. That’s just how a man’s psyche works.

So are some secrets worth keeping to yourself? That truly depends on the nature of the secret and the person who you are keeping the secret from. Some things are meant to be left as a secret and some things are meant to be revealed, but it is up to you to make that judgment call. Do you have more to lose by revealing that secret, or do you have more to gain by keeping that secret? Is it a secret that could affect your current situation or is it a secret that you are not proud of, but have little to no affect on your current status?

Decisions, decisions, decisions. If you chose to reveal, just make sure you reveal wisely. If you chose to embellish the truth, just make sure you embellish wisely. Just remember, what you say will always be on display and once the words are in the air you can’t push them back into your mouth!!

I’m just saying..

C Double R!

1 comment:

  1. You really have a good understanding of how men think. Keep up the good job!

    ReplyDelete