The Age Old Question: Light Skin vs. Dark Skin

Is light skin still preferred over dark skin, when it comes to our sistas? I was listening to the radio driving to work and I caught an interview on how Gabrielle Union constantly compares herself to other women, especially light skin sistas. She made a statement in a magazine interview how she has a complex about her nose and how she always scan the room to see if there are any light skin women in the room that looks better than her? WTF!! Are you serious?? I have personally met this woman and this woman is simply gorgeous, naturally (no plastic surgery of any kind)! She could easily pass for twenty-something, the woman is pushing 40!!


Why do women, especially beautiful women always compare themselves to other women? Are we that uncomfortable in our own skin that we can’t accept ourselves as we are? I will admit, I noticed as early as kindergarten that the boys always liked the light skinned, light eyes, long hair little girls. Us little chocolate drops with nappy hair didn’t stand a chance.

True story, when I was a kid in grade school I had a major crush on this guy, I use to send him little notes asking him to be my boyfriend, check the box; yes, no, or maybe (Yall Oldheads remember those notes?). I use to daydream about him all the time. Of course he always went for the light skinned, long hair pretty girls and never paid chocolate drop, nappy headed little old me no attention. Now fast forward to a few years ago, I ran into this dude and he was all over me, telling me how beautiful I looked, and how I filled out well (I was a flat-chested string bean all the way up to high school) and how sexy I was. I was like dayumm, I felt like Mike Jones, “Back in the day you didn’t want me!” The ironic thing about the whole story is that he ended up marrying a short hair, beautiful dark skinned sista. Go figure!

So do most men still prefer light skinned women or dark skinned women? When I was younger I always wished I had straighter hair, but I never wanted to be light skin. I love the complexion of my skin, I wouldn’t change it for nothing in the world. However, when you turn on the television and you see these actors, athletes and even politicians with either a very light skinned black woman or white woman, it really makes you wonder, wow, a dark sista just don’t stand a chance!

I think some black men today just like a variety of women, dark, light, different ethnicities, short, tall, etc., and some just still prefer light or white and would never look at a dark skinned woman as being beautiful. The ironic thing is most of these brothas are dark brothas! So I ask these brothas, do you have self hatred? Do you dislike yourself because of your skin tone and/or your race? Because what I have learned is that you can’t hate the root of the tree and love the tree. You must love yourself as a whole. Embrace that chocolate skin that you are in. I personally love my black, dark chocolate brothas, wouldn’t have it any other way!!

So I ask the question is light skin still better than dark skin?

I’m just saying???

C Double R!

Read excerpts from Reactions:

http://www.amazon.com/Reactions-Every-Action-has-Reaction/dp/1463424507/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1342471357&sr=1-1&keywords=reactions+by+c+double+r

If you have any questions, comments or suggestions please contact me at www.cdoubler2@gmail.com

Is Your Fantasy Your Reality?

I had a reader ask me this very question. He said he overheard his wife and her girlfriend discussing their fantasies and some of them were to have sex with a strange man. He wanted to know if this was just fantasy or is this something that women eventually act out? Well, that depends on the woman.


Most women fantasize, but very few actually act out their fantasies. A lot of women live vicariously through other people or things to fulfill their fantasies. They could live them out by watching porn, through their girlfriend’s sexual escapades, erotic books or by being a voyeur.

Believe it or not, your wife’s fantasies could add a little spice to your sex life. She could act out her fantasies by role playing with you. You could be that tall dark stranger that she fantasizes about and have the best sex ever.

So men don’t hate, participate, help your wife act out her fantasies to ensure that she doesn’t try to act them out with someone else. The mind is a powerful thing and just because we think about something doesn’t necessarily mean that we will act it out. Sometimes it’s refreshing to live vicariously through our fantasies, we all do it and we all have them.

However, if your mate is not sexually satisfied and continuously have an insatiable desire for sex, this can increase the probability of her acting out her fantasies with a stranger. Communication is key. Talk to your mate about her fantasies, ask her why they turn her on and try to help her live them out, with you. You may discover something about your mate you didn’t know before and like it! Better yet, you may discover something about yourself and love it!

I’m just saying.

C Double R!

Read excerpts from Reactions:

http://www.amazon.com/Reactions-Every-Action-has-Reaction/dp/1463424507/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1342471357&sr=1-1&keywords=reactions+by+c+double+r

If you have any questions, comments or suggestions please contact me at www.cdoubler2@gmail.com

Loved Up But Not Wifed Up

Ladies have you ever fell into the “wait until” trap with your man? Wait until I finish school, wait until we buy the house, wait until I get the promotion, wait until I get my divorce? Yes, women will actually stay with a man for years even though she knows he is still married in the hopes that one day he will get a divorce and marry her. Why do so many women fall for the “wait until” game?


The kicker is when the man says “I’m not going nowhere and neither are you so what’s the rush?” WTF!! Are you serious? That’s even more of a reason for him to put a ring on it! A woman will stay with a man for years, have babies for him, buy a house with him and he will never marry her you know why? Because she has already given him everything that a married coupled give each other which mean he doesn’t have any motivation to marry her. I’m just saying!!

Ladies stop playing house and stop putting the cart in front of the horse, make him work for your love. Put your foot down and if that means that you have to remove yourself from the situation to make him realize how lucky HE is to have you as his woman then do it! This is easier said than done, but in the end it is all worth it because at the end of the day you will know if the whole relationship is really worth your time and energy and if that man really loves you like he says he does.

If you are good enough to “portray” the image of the wife by living together, having kids together supporting him emotionally, spiritually and even financially then you should be good enough for him to put a ring on it and make it official and be called the Mrs. and not my lady, girl, love of my life, girlfriend or fiancée!

There is a huge difference between being the Mrs. and the girlfriend/fiancée. When a man introduces his woman as his wife there is an instant respect factor from other women as oppose to him introducing her as his lady or fiancée. Here’s some real talk, if you have a good man and other women know it and if you are not his wife then they see him as “still available”. If you don’t appreciate your worth and don’t make him wife you up then another “smart” woman will because she knows her worth just like she knows his.

I’m just saying!

If your mate hasn’t married you and you want to know why there are plenty of couple counselors in the Philadelphia area.

C Double R

Read excerpts from Reactions:

http://www.amazon.com/Reactions-Every-Action-has-Reaction/dp/1463424507/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1342471357&sr=1-1&keywords=reactions+by+c+double+r

If you have any questions, comments or suggestions please contact me at www.cdoubler2@gmail.com

Looking for Mr. Fix It Chick

Hey Fellas, have you ever met that woman that is always utilizing you for your skills? Asking you can you come over, my toilet won’t flush? Can you take a look at my electric, my lights keep flickering? Can you check my brakes, they keep making a funny noise? Can you redo my kitchen floor, its warped? And in return she fixes you dinner, give you some nookie and keep your number on speed dial!


This is the woman who will not date a man if she doesn’t think he can benefit her in some way? He has to be handy like an electrician, plumber, mechanic, or a carpenter, shoot even a barber if she has sons! If he ain’t useful then he ain’t worthy. This kind of woman scopes out men that can help her in some shape, form or fashion. She looks at it as a barter situation. You do something for me and I will do something for you. If you fix my sink, I’ll give you some food and a drink. You fix my brakes I’ll kiss the snake. If you fix my floor I’ll show you the entrance to my bedroom door.

See Fellas, she doesn’t see anything wrong with this. Besides, you’re getting what you want and she is getting what she wants. Therefore, the both of you are getting satisfied. I’m just saying, recognize the game. Don’t think just because she constantly invites you over that she is really into you. Now ask yourself this question, “Every time you go to her house does she ask you to fix or look at something, while the fried chicken is cooking on the stove and mac and cheese is baking in the oven? Or if nothing is cooking does she come to the door in a skimpy outfit or better yet a towel wrapped around her saying she just stepped out the shower then asked you to look at something that is broke? Men this is part of the mental seduction so she can get what she really wants, which is her damn stove fixed!! Dummy!!

And you’re the same man who is going around bragging saying she is feeling you, because every time you go over to her house she got food ready for you or something sexy on. All the while not mentioning what you have to do to get that damn food and her! Some men are so easily distracted when it comes to a sexy woman and a tasty plate of food. Men, when will you learn to read between the lines? Now, if you do read between the lines and you’re cool with that, then so be it. But please don’t think just because a woman is doing all of this for you and to you that she is really into you! Remember women are some of the most conniving creatures walking the planet and we definitely know how to get what we want without you ever realizing it.

I’m just saying….



C Double R

Read excerpts from Reactions:

http://www.amazon.com/Reactions-Every-Action-has-Reaction/dp/1463424507/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1342471357&sr=1-1&keywords=reactions+by+c+double+r

If you have any questions, comments or suggestions please contact me at www.cdoubler2@gmail.com

Act Like a Lady But Be a Freak in the Bedroom

We all heard of the saying you can’t make a freak into a wife, but you can definitely make a wife into a freak. Let’s keep it real people, men love an uninhibited woman in the bedroom. Most women don’t realize their sexuality until their mid to late thirties or early forties, in some cases, never!


The sex novelist Zane said she realized she was a sexual person at a very early age in life, that’s very rare, especially for a woman. She said she embraced her sexuality very young and always enjoyed sex. Growing up most women are told to act like a lady, ladies don’t do that, let him take control when it comes to sex. So when a woman wants to get “buckwild” in the bedroom most of the time she doesn’t because she is constantly thinking about all of the things that she was told as a young woman.

I believe the older a woman becomes the more in tune she is with her body and because of that she is more uninhibited in the bedroom when it comes to sex. She knows how to please her man and is not afraid of showing it.

A mature woman knows and accepts that she has sexual desires, just like a man and it isn’t unlady like to express those desires when it comes to your man, it may even help you keep your man! A man loves a woman who embraces her sexuality and doesn’t hold back in the bedroom. Men love when their women take control in the bedroom and ladies if you only knew the power you had in the bedroom, you would embrace your sexuality with the quickness!

So ladies, I demand you to embrace your sexuality and show your man what you’re working with. Live out your fantasies, your wildest dreams and turn your man out!!

Because if you don’t step up your game in the bedroom he might find another player to substitute you!

I’m just saying!

Read excerpts from Reactions:

http://www.amazon.com/Reactions-Every-Action-has-Reaction/dp/1463424507/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1342471357&sr=1-1&keywords=reactions+by+c+double+r

If you have any questions, comments or suggestions please contact me at www.cdoubler2@gmail.com

Ain’t Nothing Going on But the Rent!

Draws in the drawer, but no money for the bills, when should you ask your new live-in lover to help pay bills? I think we all have either experienced this or know someone who has experienced this situation.


Ladies, you meet your new guy, and everything is going well. You guys are hanging out almost every day, going out to dinner, dancing, the movies and the sex is banging! In the beginning your new Boo packed an overnight bag and stayed overnight and then left in the morning. Fast forward three months down the road and this man has completely moved into your damn house, unbeknownst to you!! Dude is no longer packing an overnight bag he has taken over your underwear draw and half of your damn closet!

Now you feel like you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place because you like having him there, but at the same time your food is being depleted faster than you can replace it and the utility bills are slowly creeping up, not to mention the laundry load. You feel uncomfortable asking him to contribute financially because technically he doesn’t live there and he is still paying bills for his own house. And on top of all that, dude already have a key to your front door!

My question to you is, “Why are you the one feeling uncomfortable, especially in your own damn house?” If anyone should feel uncomfortable it should be the Guest That Wouldn’t Leave. What kind of man just takes it upon himself to move into his woman’s house without even thinking about offering to pay a bill? I tell you what, no man of mine! I think when we are in that “Honeymoon” stage of our new relationships we are so caught up that we really don’t see what is really going on around us. Ladies and men too, it’s ok to fall in love but don’t get caught up to the point where you’re feeling uncomfortable in your own home. Your home is the one place where you should feel comfortable and also feel respected in.

So just pay attention, if you feel like things are moving too fast then be like Roy Rogers and Slowwww Down! And always, always, always have “The Financial Responsibility That Comes With This Key Talk” before you decide to hand over your key because the last thing you want or need is a grown ass man as a dependent!!

I'm just saying..

C Double R

Read excerpts from Reactions:

http://www.amazon.com/Reactions-Every-Action-has-Reaction/dp/1463424507/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1342471357&sr=1-1&keywords=reactions+by+c+double+r

If you have any questions, comments or suggestions please contact me at www.cdoubler2@gmail.com

Ladies, Stop Being the Pit Stop and Learn to Be the Final Destination When it Comes to Men

Some women constantly ask themselves how did I end up in this situation again. How come I am never the main woman, but always the side woman? I am a caring loving woman, but why do I always give my love to the wrong man? Because you ALLOW it! Period!


Only a fool will continue to make the same mistakes and expect different results. If you allow a man, or anyone for that matter, to take advantage of you then they will. We have to learn to man up and be a woman. We have to stop letting men mistake our kindness for our weakness.

Here’s a little advice, when you meet a man make sure you are asking the pertinent question, therefore if anything every pops up he can’t ever use that excuse “Well, you never asked!”. You should always ask a man from the gate these five important questions:

Are you Married?

Do you have a girlfriend?

Do you live with anyone?

Do you have any baby momma drama?

Are you bi, tri or straight?

If you ask these five important questions and the answers rolls off his tongue, whether you like the answers or not then that’s a good sign because for the most part at least you know he’s an honest man. If he hesitates to answers these questions, proceed with caution or turn around and walk away. This could mean he has something to hide.

However, if a man is straight up with you and tells you that he is married or has a girlfriend and you still get involved with this man than shame on you and you are free to label yourself a “pit stop”. A pit stop meaning he comes to you to replenish himself and to get re-energized so he can make it to his final destination, his main woman. You are solely a Pick-Me –Upper in route to the main destination.

So ladies, if you are tired of being a pit stop then stop allowing a man to refuel, get new tires and mechanical repairs and adjustments at your emotional and physical expense in route to his final destination.

I’m just saying.

C Double R!

Read excerpts from Reactions:


http://www.amazon.com/Reactions-Every-Action-has-Reaction/dp/1463424507/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1342471357&sr=1-1&keywords=reactions+by+c+double+r

If you have any questions, comments or suggestions please contact me at www.cdoubler2@gmail.com

Display what you say - so there is no room for doubt

Most people can talk a good game, but most people don’t display a good game. People can talk a good game from playing sports, cooking, work, and most importantly, especially when it comes to relationships. But the question is, “Are you really displaying what you’re saying?”


Most people will tell you what they think you want to hear just so there can get what they really want whether its sex, money, trips, shopping sprees or a place to shack up. Unfortunately, for some it’s all about “me, me, me” and not “us, us, us” and the unsuspecting person usually doesn’t find this out until after the other person has gotten what they wanted.

Read the signs people. It’s that simple. If someone is telling you that they love you, but not displaying it, more than likely they have a hidden agenda and only telling you what you want to hear. If this person is continuously disappointing you because they don’t display what they say and is always letting you down, more than likely they don’t care about you the way they claim they do. Unexpected things sometimes happen but when this becomes the norm it’s just an excuse for the person to get out of what they promised you when they never had any intentions on doing it in the first place.

When a person cares for you and loves you they will not only show it to you, but to the world. This article was actually inspired by a Facebook post. Case and point, a young man was repeatedly getting inboxed by a young lady whom already knew he was in a committed relationship but still continued to inbox him anyway. The young man became so frustrated he put her on blast on Facebook, but was kind enough to omit the young lady’s name. He kindly stated that he was happily in a relationship which was heading towards marriage and if she continued to inbox him he would reveal her inboxed messages to all his Facebook friends. This is of course, after he repeatedly told her he was not interested and he was in a committed relationship. This, my friends, is displaying what you say.

I’m just saying...

Read excerpts from Reactions:


http://www.amazon.com/Reactions-Every-Action-has-Reaction/dp/1463424507/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1342471357&sr=1-1&keywords=reactions+by+c+double+r

If you have any questions, comments or suggestions please contact me at www.cdoubler2@gmail.com

Just because I am sexy doesn't mean you can sex me..

Just because I wear tight jeans that accentuate the roundness of my bottom, or a dress that compliment my curvy hips and thick thighs doesn’t mean I’m ready to jump in your bed. Just because I’m sexy doesn’t mean you can sex me!


I had a good friend of mine ask me to write about this topic. She wanted me to clear up the misconception of a sexy woman. Some men think just because a woman is sexy she is easy to sex. Now let’s examine the word sexy, shall we. There is a difference from being sexy and being trashy. A woman can be sexy in a pair of jeans and a tee shirt. The jeans may be sexy because they hug her in all the right spots and the fitted tee shirt because it highlights her assets. She is being sexy without even trying and without exposing her skin. Trashy is when a woman is drawing attention to herself for all of the wrong reasons because she have damn near all of her orifices hanging out for the whole world to see. Ladies this is not sexy this is trashy.

As my homegirl Ms. Nikki said just because I am sexy doesn’t mean I want to have sex with you. I’m sexy and classy not sexy and trashy. I’m sexy dressed up or down. I own sexy where others have to lease it with an option to buy.

So guys learn to differentiate sexy classy from sexy trashy and once you recognize the difference make sure your game is tight if you want to be with Ms. Right. If your game is weak then you may end up with the freak of the week!

I’m just saying


C Double R!

Make sure you pick up her new erotic suspense novel REACTIONS now available at www.cdoubler.com

If you would like to ask C Double R! any questions, leave comments or topic suggestions please
contact me at cdoubler2@gmail.com

Time to get rid of your bad habits

As we start the New Year we often think about new resolutions to achieve for the year. We make resolutions to get rid of our vices from stop smoking, losing weight, living a healthier life, saving money, finding a new job and buying our dream home. But how many of us make resolutions to improve our personal relationships?   How many of us make a vow to get rid of our bad habits when it comes to our relationship?

Ladies you know what I’m talking about, that bad habit that you just can’t seem to shake. He’s about 6’1, gorgeous smile, handsome, dark and has incomparable skills in the bedroom, but outside of that he’s pretty much useless to you. But for some reason you can’t seem to shake him.

Fellas, what about your bad habits? She’s build like an hourglass, face of a top model and looks great on your arm but outside of that she’s just a damn liability? However, you continue to keep her around because she’s a great trophy in the public’s eye.

As we get older and start to realize that life is more than great sex and a pretty face we are less likely to partake in these kinds of relationships. We may entertain them once and a while but less frequently and for a shorter amount of time. This is when we realize that relationships are more about compatibility and sustainability.

When you realize that you have more years behind you than in front of you this is when you start to get serious about whom you are willing to spend the rest of your life with or at least learn what things you are willing to tolerate and the things that you are not.

Since we are still in the first week of the New Year it is still time to revise your resolutions and start getting rid of those bad habits that you weren’t able to shake in the past. Ask yourself is this someone I can see myself getting old with or someone who will be there for me when I deserve it the least but need it the most? You know the answer.

I’m just saying.

Read excerpts from Reactions:http://www.amazon.com/Reactions-Every-Action-has-Reaction/dp/1463424507/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1342471357&sr=1-1&keywords=reactions+by+c+double+r

Read more articles from C Double R at www.crazyazzwomen.blogspot.com

If you have any questions, comments or suggestions please contact me at www.cdoubler2@gmail.com