Concessions vs. Settling for a Man

Ladies, I know if we could create our own man we would make him with all of the characteristics on our “wish list”. Chili from TLC had a show on VH1 entitled “What Chilli Wants”. Unfortunately, what she wants doesn't exist, well at least not in one man. She is looking for a man who is super fine, washboard stomach, rich, don’t smoke or drink, God fearing, tall, no more than two baby mommas and most importantly he must be BIG in the right area!! WHAT??????? CP! (Translation Child Please!) Chilli, you couldn’t create a man like that, even if you had the tools to do so!

See, this is where I have a problem with women. Some women live in a fantasy world and that is the main reason why so many women are singled until one day they wake up and realizes that they wasted so many years looking for a man that doesn’t exist they panic and pick up the first thing that’s breathing, just so they can say they have a man!! Are you serious? So let’s see, you went from unbelievable expectations to the bottom of the barrel expectations just so you can say you have a man or just so you don’t have to be alone.

Ladies, ladies, ladies, please understand the difference between making concessions for a man and settling for a man. Let me explain the difference. A concession is when you date or enter into a relationship with a man who doesn’t have some of the characteristics that you normally like in a man. For instance, you may prefer dark skinned men, but you happen to meet a light skinned brotha that have all of the important qualities that you look for in a man so you make a concession for this man. Another example is you may have a rule you only like to date tall men, but you happen to meet an average height man, who again, has all of the other important qualities that you look for in a man, so you make a concession for this man.

Now let’s talk about settling for a man, shall we. Most women settle for a man when they get desperate. Desperate to be in a relationship, just to be in a relationship! It doesn’t matter if dude doesn’t have a job, 8 kids with 6 different baby mommas, beat your ass, a drunk or a habitual cheater. As long as you can say you have a man, it’s all good!

The one thing women can do to avoid getting to this stage is to learn to understand their self- worth. Period! Once you understand and can appreciate your worth then you won’t become desperate because you know what your worthy of. It will become an innate behavior which won’t allow you to settle for the crap when it comes to men or anything in life. Once a woman masters this task she will clearly know the difference between making a concession and settling for a man.

So getting back to my girl Chilli, until she can understand the difference between settling and making a concession when it comes to men she will forever find herself alone! Because believe me we all make concessions when it comes to our relationships. Trust me, whatever man she decides to be with will be making a concession too when it comes to her, because there are no perfect people in this world and that includes you too Ms. Chilli!

I’m just saying.

C Double R!



If you would like to ask C Double R! any questions, leave comments or topic suggestions please contact her at cdoubler2@gmail.com