Monday, August 17, 2009

Question for my Ladies?

Ladies, when is it ok to give the new guy a break? Let me give you a mind’s visual. You meet a guy, he appears to be everything you’re looking for, secure financially, great personality, and all he wants to do (or claims) is make you happy. At what point do you give in and let him make you happy.

Unfortunately, I am a skeptic when it comes to men that seem a little too good to be true. I was always told if it sounds too good to be true then more than likely it is too good to be true. So my question is when do I allow this man to come into my life and try to make me happy?

I know the men are saying, “That’s what’s wrong with women, especially black women, we don’t recognize a good man when he is standing right in front of us.” My answer to all you men is, yes, most of you represent well, very well for the first 3 months or so, then soon after your representative leaves the building to never to be seen again. So I think I will definitely stick to the 90 day rule with this one. I feel as though, if the brotha is real and if he is all that he claims to be then it should be revealed in his actions. If he is displaying what he is saying then he is definitely a keeper. But if his walk don’t match is talk then he is full of sh*& and I am flushing it down the toilet.

I went to an interesting set on Saturday nite called Mars/Venus. It was a gathering of both men and women and we talked real sh*& when it came to male/female issues. The men asked the women questions that concerned them about women and women asked the men questions that concerned them about men. Then it was the Hot Topic question session, which could be answered by both men and women. At times it became very heated. Majority of the men questions were geared towards sex and most of the women questions had to deal with emotional issues. I left feeling the same way I came, men don’t know shi* about women and women will never understand that men have an insatiable desire for a variety of women. PERIOD!!

See, I am open minded and a realist. If this man happens to turn out to be all that he claims to be then I am willing to tolerant some of the male deficiencies, which is part of a man’s “make up”. However, some things that are intolerable are lack of honesty and loyalty. I have learned that if a man is loyal to you then he won’t lie to you. For loyalty encompasses honesty. Let me break it down so it can forever be broken. A man can be honest, but not loyal. But it is hard for a man to be loyal and not honest. See a man can cheat on you and be honest about it, but that doesn’t make him loyal. You feel me? Now, if a man is loyal then he won’t cheat on you because if he cheats then his ass is not loyal to you. Ladies, feel free to use that quote. But whatever you do always remember the difference between honesty and loyalty.

I need to find out if I am dealing with an honest man or a loyal man. That still remains to be seen. ’It’s been a month, so expect an update in two months to the day, October 17th to be exact!

Stay Tuned???


C Double R


  1. Chanel, I agree with all you have said! I have my wall up for reasons that have happened in the past. So, when I meet a man I am very skeptical as to whether he is "too good to be true." Yes, Yes I know the men are saying that's why we don't recognize a good man BUT if your past experiences has not been good then what am I to do?

    Keep the blog up girl! & Good luck!

  2. Chanel you are soo on point! If a man is interested and asks me what I would look for, I always tell the LOYALTY..... A woman scorned is nothing to play with and al women should feel a man out, and watch if his actions match his words..... and always remember to go with your gut!!!